There are currently two men in my life - and only two - that I truly and completely trust to give me discipline spankings. One is my Mentor. The other is my very close friend Vincent. I'm a very lucky young lady to have both of these men in my life. They both truly care about ME... I'm much more to them than just someone to get to spank. And I have a great deal of respect for both of them.
The only snag is that neither of them is close enough to meet with on a very regular basis. Perhaps this is supposed to help teach me patience (my Mentor does say I have a problem with patience). Most of the time, I deal with the distance issue pretty well. But sometimes, I get... well... impatient. I want a spanking RIGHT NOW. I don't want to wait.
This was the case this past weekend. Now, my Mentor, knowing that it's not always possible for us to get together when I have the need, is ok with me getting spankings from others for the most part. He wants to know about them... I ask permission. It just feels right to me, especially considering the poor judgments I've made about some of the people I've met in the past.
I had been chatting with a guy online, and had developed a sort of rapport with him. He was off work Monday for Columbus Day, and wanted to get together. I asked my Mentor, and he said it was ok with him. He told me that he wanted me to ask for 20 hard and fast swats over my jeans - as a reminder of part of the discipline spanking I had coming from him.
I did ask the guy for those 20 swats, and he said ok, but we never got to them. I was thinking we'd do them at the end, but I actually ended up safe-wording out of the spanking, because he was literally taking the skin off my bottom.
So I had to e-mail my Mentor and let him know I hadn't gotten the 20 swats he had asked me to get. He was disappointed that I didn't do the one and only thing he had asked of me. I honestly didn't deliberately disobey him. We had some miscommunication. He told me to ask for the 20 "if things work out and he swings a paddle with authority." He thought I should have gotten them first. I didn't know how I was supposed to know if he swung a paddle with authority in order know if things were going to work out so I'd know if I should ask for the 20 swats or not! Yeah... this is how my thinking gets me in trouble!
And then I got an e-mail from Vincent (a response to me complaining about the distance and how much I needed a spanking) saying that I needed to be patient (there's that word again!) and he didn't ever want to hear again that I had let some jerk beat my bottom black and blue because I wanted a spanking so bad that I wasn't as careful as I should have been. This e-mail came almost immediately after I sent him the story of what happened with this guy, so it was NOT a response to that. Yeah.... I had just sent him exactly what he was telling me that he better not ever hear from me again. My response was, "Oh, shit." I got back, "Oh, shit is right, Young Lady."
So. Two of the three men I respect and admire most in the world (my dad's the other, but he hasn't spanked me since I was a little girl, and (I hope) doesn't know I get them now) were now disappointed in me, and I wasn't even trying to misbehave.
Alot of the choices I've made in my life have been poor ones. I've done the wrong thing alot. And most of the time I have known that what I was doing was wrong. I've known that I'd probably get in trouble for it. But this time, I thought I was doing okay. I asked for, and got, permission to get that spanking. I did ask the guy for the 20 swats my Mentor wanted me to ask for. I was clear with him that one of the boundaries was that we stopped if there was any sign of broken skin. And when I realized that he was spanking two raw spots into my bottom, I safe-worded out - something I almost NEVER do.
I didn't think I had done anything wrong, but I was STILL in trouble with both my Mentor and with Vincent.
So I've got a new motto: This is Jessie.... I don't have to go looking for trouble, it finds me all on it's own.
I'm still here. It's been a busy spring and summer. Morgan had a very rough spring. She spent a grand total of 26 days in the hospital and had 2 major abdo...