A few months ago, while I was searching for someone to be a regular spanker, I talked to and met with several different men for spankings. Hey, it was research! Anyway, this guy - I'll call him by his initials CT - he was the same age as I am. That generally doesn't work for me in spanking. I very much prefer my spanker, especially if he's a discipline spanker, to be at least a couple of years older than me. But the first few times I chatted with him, he seemed like a pretty okay guy.
One day, I'd met with another guy for my second spanking from him - I'll write his story another time - but that evening I was sitting on an icepack for the first time in my life. I had chatted with CT the night before, and he knew I was getting a spanking that day. He messaged me when he saw me online.
I wish I had saved that chat, but I didn't. He was trying to get me to let him come over and spank me again. I told him that even if my bottom wasn't more bruised than it had ever been in my life, he couldn't just come over to my house without us meeting in public first. I told him it was my own biggest rule, and a promise I had made very early on to the man who gave me my first true discipline spanking. He kept pushing, and I kept telling him no. He finally gave up.
That same night, I met James. We chatted for hours, and it was an instant connection. I don't want to say too much about him either, because I want to tell his story separately too.
So 8 days later, I'm online in the middle of the night, and CT comes on. Here's the conversation:
CT: good morning
CT: are you online?
JF: I am now
CT: were you sleeping?
JF: I was for a little while, but I have to work tonight (Friday) I usually stay up the night before so I can sleep during the day.... was wiped out, though, so I took a nap
CT: can't sleep here and don't have to work tomorrow
JF: I don't sleep well at night
JF: Never have
JF: one of the reasons I work nights
CT: so the bruises are finally going away?
JF: yeah, just about completely faded finally. Still a small line of yellow on my right upper thigh as of last night
JF: 8 days....
CT: so you need new ones
JF: don't need or want ones that bad though
CT: was it a paddle?
JF: It was several paddles, and he broke two of them
CT: disciplinarian or casual spanker?
JF: I wouldn't really classify him as either of those, really.
JF: he sure was proud of how hard he could swing a paddle
CT: but he did not talk right?
JF: nope... he would ask me if I was ready each time he picked up a different paddle, but that was it
JF: I could have said no, I suppose
JF: But not my style
CT: yes but you didn't and I should spank you for it
CT: I know you do not want a perfect stranger coming over to spank you, but what if I were to tell you I am not perfect
JF: Ohhh...well now you see, I can’t let you do that. Besides the fact that it breaks my own biggest rule like I told you last time…I've found someone for discipline...and if I were to let you just come over here, I’m pretty sure he’d take the skin off my ass.
CT: so you have met someone?
JF: Yeah.... we had dinner the other night. No spanking. Just dinner. Just talking.
JF: We decided to hold off on the spanking since I still had bruises
JF: However... there is a strap hanging on my bedroom wall... waiting
CT: would love to come over and use it
JF: Oh, I'm sure you would...
CT: hand, strap, belt etc...
CT: sounds like you need one anyway
JF: Oh, I always need one
CT: yep sounds like you do and you crave it
JF: Oh I do... totally... I think about it all the time.
CT: well we are both up, with nothing to do......
JF: Are you TRYING to get me in trouble?
CT: maybe, but he would not spank you due to some bruises you would have
JF: Sounds like YOU need a spanking!!!
CT: nope I need to give one young lady! warm up with my hand and move on to a belt etc....
JF: I dare say that my new friend would disapprove greatly of me letting someone else spank me before he does, now that the bruises have faded. And besides, it would be awfully disrespectful of me to do to him.
CT: did you tell them they are gone? When is he due over?
JF: Certainly you are not suggesting that I let you spank me and not tell him about it?
CT: no, not good to lie to a disciplinarian
JF: No, most definitely not.
CT: but when is he due to come over and spank you?
JF: Probably not until Tuesday or so because I work until then
CT: ah so there should be no bruises by then
JF: They should definitely be all gone by then
CT: even any that could happen tonight
JF: Yes, probably so. However...like I said… it would be extremely disrespectful of me to have asked him to wait until the bruises healed, so that my first spanking from him was not on top of someone else’s marks, and then let someone else spank me.
CT: Ok, but means no fun tonight, but I do understand what you are saying
JF: Trust me... I am dying for a spanking. But he makes me want to do things right.
JF: It's awfully new for me!
CT: so have one last fling tonight... it would be fun!
JF: NO! It’s not right, and it’s not worth feeling guilty over, no matter how bad I want a spanking.
CT: ok, no sting of my hand on your backside tonight then
JF: Too bad for you...
JF: Don’t feel too bad. There’s a whole table of paddles over there that I can’t play with
CT: Too bad for you.....
CT: though I could give you a hand with them
JF: Good Lord, I bet you were a lot of trouble as a kid!
CT: nope, good kid, and a better spanker
JF: Good kid... right.... nope, don't buy it.
CT: hmm your all worked up aren't you, too much spanking talk and thoughts going through your head..
JF: You have no idea
CT: yes you are eyeing that strap and paddles, just wishing....
JF: I would like to lose that strap, actually! Let the dogs chew on it or something
CT: but the paddles?
JF: Oh the paddles can stay... the paddles are pretty... I like to touch them
CT: I bet you do and like the touch of them
JF: Nothing quite like the feeling of a silky smooth paddle on your skin
CT: ah, well I wish I can talk you into a spanking tonight, a nice long butt warming but you do not want that, or could probably handle it
JF: It’s not going to happen, so you can stop trying to provoke me
CT: when you were getting lots of spankings, what would happen after the spanking, what type of aftercare?
JF: If you're talking sexual, that really didn't happen.
JF: But there was a lot of spanking
JF: And (I'm sure) mutual masturbation
JF: once both parties were alone
JF: I did have one guy who actually said, "I want you to give me a blow job now."
JF: And I said, "Umm.... no."
CT: then what did he do?
JF: He said, "Oh, ok. Sorry."
CT: that was presumptious of him
JF: It was, yes.... poor guy... he actually turned out to be a pretty good friend
JF: And he got his blow job later
JF: From my sister
CT: ? your sister is into spanking?
JF: No, my sister is into having sex
JF: She is a lightweight when it comes to spanking
CT: so your not a light weight? worried about what the other guy would do if I spank you?
JF: NO, I’m not “worried about what the other guy would do” if you spanked me. I respect myself AND him enough not to do let you do it. It’s not about fear, it's about respect, which seems to be something you know nothing about. If I chose to do it anyway, yes, I’d probably get a hell of a blistering, and I would deserve every bit of it. Not wanting that blistering is NOT being a lightweight. Do I want a spanking? Hell, yes. Do I want it bad enough to do something that will disappoint him AND me AND earn myself a blistering in the process? Not particularly. If that makes me a lightweight in your eyes, so be it. I have nothing to prove to you.
CT: well I hope Tuesday is worth it then
JF: It already is
CT: how so?
JF: Because he hasn't laid a single swat on me, and he's been an influence already
JF: If it ended right here.... he has already helped me changed my life. And it needed changing in a big way.
CT: so if it were not for him I would be spanking you right now?
JF: It's possible.
CT: and that is better?
JF: You know, I think it is.
CT: Ok, well I am going to try and sleep some, since no spankings to be found here
Would you believe that after this, I actually let this guy spank me about a week later? Not surprisingly, it was a disaster. Maybe I'll write about it later. Not sure it is worth the time and effort.
I'm still here. It's been a busy spring and summer. Morgan had a very rough spring. She spent a grand total of 26 days in the hospital and had 2 major abdo...