tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4555043728697759890.post1650071626555535340..comments2018-05-24T22:45:19.150-05:00Comments on True Confessions of a Lifelong Spankaholic: Humility, not humiliationJesshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13796961063184552863noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4555043728697759890.post-75777741814044697572008-11-05T07:13:00.000-06:002008-11-05T07:13:00.000-06:00I too am one who does not judge OR understand humi...I too am one who does not judge OR understand humiliation. <BR/><BR/>I have tried to talk to a number of women who claim to be into humiliation (I am a straight man who sees no reason to talk with other men all that much.)<BR/><BR/>Not one of them seems to really understand humiliation either.<BR/><BR/>To me "humiliation" is misused as much as "submission" is. <BR/><BR/>In my experience, for example, most women only "submit" to things that feed some desire within them. In my mind, you cannot submit to that which you desire. So in that sense "submission" strikes me as an act that to the "vanilla" world seems against their best interest or inclination. But to the "submissive" woman, what they do is as vital to them as the air they breathe. <BR/><BR/>Assuming you are in a totally honest relationship, I think it is critical to discover what gives a submissive the greatest pleasure and what gives them the least.<BR/><BR/>Do they truly want to submit? Do they truly want to be disciplined?<BR/><BR/>If the submissive is male, for example, make him masterbate before you discipline him. In most cases that removes, at least temporarily, any sexual pleasure he might receive from a spanking.<BR/><BR/>If you know the submissive craves the stinging crack of a big paddle, when it's time for punishment, use a thin switch across her butt.<BR/><BR/>Humiliation seems to be the same as submission. In a "vanilla" frame of mind, certain things may make you feel humiliated, but often those same things are the things that can arouse some "into" humiliation. It's a trick thing. How many women would feel humiliated if their man brought home another woman to had hot, rough sex with that other woman as she looked on. Many would but many would also be aroused by watching it.<BR/><BR/>In reality, I think true submission is a rare thing and so is humiliation . . . especially when it's consentual . . . which it should be.<BR/><BR/>That's my 50 cents.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4555043728697759890.post-57904761087216372962008-10-18T08:42:00.000-05:002008-10-18T08:42:00.000-05:00Purposeless humiliation bothers me greatly. When u...Purposeless humiliation bothers me greatly. When used to accent a particularly stupid behavior, like drunk driving, fine, but... I was at a convention and a couple used it as part of their D/s relationship, and it made me EXTREMELY upset on her behalf. I guess I just don't understand it.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com